Comedy Dialogues - Raja Ki Nazar Sab Par Hai

 

HERO AUDITION SCRIPT

Raja sits cross-legged on the floor, pretending to read a newspaper. But his eyes peek from the corner — watching the dhobi trying to fool Rishabh with money. Suddenly, Raja jumps up and grabs the dhobi by the ear.

RAJA (stare karte hue gusse mein thoda)  — Aye vaayda! Kyun re? Kyun re? Bhool gaya kya ? Kal  Mota bhai  ne zyada paise diye tujhe !  Ullu banata  hai ? Ullu banata hai? Chal, chal… extra paise do wapis ! (Smiles and apni ankh matkae te hue say )Mujhe sab pata hai… kaamwali didi se baatein hoti hain teri.Uske liye gajra khareedna hai na? Hain na? Bol, bol!  (akhon se ghoorte hue) Meri nazar sab par hai…  Raja ki aankhon se koi nahi bachta!  Dekhta hoon main kaise chai – samosa ki party karta ho kaamwali didi ke saath! (beat, phir teasing smile) Arre bhai ! poore paise do… Aaj kaamwali didi gajra laga ke aayi hai aaj Maine dekha tha! (laughs)  Chalo, pure paiso do..!  Raja apni dulhan ke liye isse chunari lega!

Raja  keeps money in his pocket Tabhi Raja par paani girti hai.  Raja poora bheeg jaata hai, baal chehre par chipak jaate hain. Woh jhatak kar paani hataata hai.

RAJA — Arre! Kyun gila kar diya mujhe? Mujhe nahana pasand nahi hai!

Raja gusse se maa ko dekhta hai.

MAA – Dhulan chahiye naa ..!   Toh uske liye thoda saaf-sutra bhi rehna padega na!

Raja turant khush ho jaata hai.

RAJA — Dulhan ke liye toh main sab kar lunga!  (phir confused) Par dulhan ko kyun chahiye ki main nahau?  Phir SRK-style pose — haath upar kar ke ..says Meri dulhan mujhe dhulaa maan legi… aise hi! (thoda galat dialogue bol deta hai, filmy swag mein) Kyunki… I love meri dulhan-n-n-n! (like kkk kiran..!)